On November 23, 2023, I embarked on a totally new adventure knowing failure was a very possible outcome; a 10-day silent meditation course. 10 days. 10 hours of meditation every day with the purpose of learning the Vipassana technique of meditation (more information at www.dhamma.org).
I was with 30 other women observing Noble Silence (which means not interacting in any way) eating a vegetarian diet, no books, journal, music, computer, phone, knitting, Parchisi, or any other distraction that would take you away from fully devoting your attention to learning and practicing the technique.
I’ve done hard things, but nothing that required silence, sitting still and focusing my mind for 10 hours a day! (If you know me, you’re laughing right now because it’s so true.)
Ten days later, I drove away triumphant! (and talking…a lot!) It was wonderful and terrible and hard and so fulfilling and beneficial! Here are 7 things I learned.
- My brain is silly. It’s not just to entertain people. It simply works that way. I know this because there was a running dialogue in my head and most of it was ridiculous and completely inappropriate based on the serious Zen nature of the environment. Every time I thought something ridiculous or accidently burped during meditation, a surfer dude voice in my head, much like a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle would say “Duuuuuude, that’s not very noble!”.
- It is astounding how much air moves around the bodies of 60 people on a strict vegetarian diet, trying to sit in complete stillness.
- Inner-body air does not observe Noble Silence
- The meditation session after the black bean tortilla lunch was the most
gurgle-icious.
- As soon as you start getting judgey about Burps McGee next to you, your air pipes up. A lesson to us all!
- You know those monks and yogis who serenely sit criss-cross applesauce (“lotus position” if you’re noble!) for hours and you wonder how they do it? There’s no secret…their legs are probably asleep or cramping up! Something we worked on was separating the physical sensations (pain and/or numbness in a particular body part) with the mental experience (“OH MY GOD THIS IS AGONY and my legs are going to fall off and I’m never going to walk again! What is this unholy torture?”) It’s not easy, but it is possible! I was even able to do it a few times! But you know what I couldn’t do it with? The stewed prunes they served at breakfast! Torture on all fronts!
(Just for clarification, my legs never fell off, I walked away from every meditation just fine, and people with legitimate body part issues were happily provided with chairs.)
- I cannot help but motivate! When we learned the technique of scanning areas of the body to observe the sensations, I full-on middle-manager-pep-talked to my body parts!
“Ok, shoulder, what do you have for me? Oh…oh…I feel that! Nice job. *finger guns* Keep it up. Ok bicep, you’re next. Got anything? No? No worries, I’ll be back. Elbow, you never let me down. You gonna sing this round? YES! *mental high-five* Thank you! Forearm, you’re up!”
and on and on, over and over for an hour. Later I learned that all that enthusiasm and encouragement was completely NOT the technique. Oops!
- I’ve always believed in the Michelle Obama quote “It’s harder to hate up close.” This was driven home when I was in close quarters with 30 people I didn’t know and wasn’t interacting with for 10 days. I thought Nina was a snotty jerk and I was in a fight with Dawn (in my mind) because she was policing the walking trail to be sure we didn’t make any pinecone art! (How dare she?!) Turned out they were both absolutely lovely.
We tell ourselves so many stories about the people around us and most of the stories are just simply wrong. When we have the guts to approach and engage, we realize that a vast majority of the people on this planet are absolutely wonderful human beings.
- I actually can shut up for a long time! (I don’t plan to ever again, but I am able, which surprised a lot of people! Some even had money on it. Stinkers.)
- If you want to learn anything new, first you have to have the guts to risk failure and start. Then do the work. It’s scary. It’s hard, and it can be really frustrating and disappointing, but if you make it through all that, you can’t not come out stronger, more resilient and so proud of yourself.
All in all, it was an amazing experience. A few people left before the 10 days were over, but not as many as you might think. There was a possibility I would be one of them. That possibility made completing the course so much more fulfilling and strengthening. I earned that, and undoubtedly the lessons will keep on coming!
Go be terrible at something Tiger…and have an amazing 2024!!
