| “If you’re not building an empire and exfoliating your soul before sunrise, just give up. You’re not even in the game.” |
| We live in an interesting time. With memes and quote tiles all around, there are a lot of mixed messages coming at us. Hustle porn is a big one. Go to social media and you will see all kinds of motivational posts about working hard.Rise and GrindDon’t stop when you’re tired. Stop when you’re done!Conquer the world by starting at 4amThe only way to win is to work twice as hard as your competitor.  |
| I just read Careless People: A Cautionary Tale of Power, Greed, and Lost Idealism by Sarah Wynn-Williams. It’s a fascinating expose’ that the executives at Meta (formerly Facebook) don’t want you to read! Aside from the shocking behavior on the part of the FB higher ups, Wynn-Williams tells of her own painful and unsustainable drive to out-work what is possible. Many times while reading, I was shocked that she put those expectations on herself. (sending work e-mails while her child was literally being born from her body, and traveling overseas when gravely ill are just 2 that pop into my head). It made me wonder how many professionals put that kind of pressure on themselves, are being expected to put that kind of pressure on themselves and are absolutely miserable and sick because of it. I’m not going to say that hard work isn’t important. I have worked very hard in many of the roles I’ve had, and it has paid off. I still work late, and sometimes get up at 3am to finish something that needs to get done. But with stress, anxiety, overwhelm, burnout and depression at all-time high levels, expectations like these can create an unrealistic and unsustainable work and life cultures that make people feel like they’re constantly underperforming and can never measure up. DO MORE DO MORE…ARRRRRGH! |
 If we want the best from ourselves and our team members, rest and realistic pacing are also important. Go to social media and you’ll also see motivational posts about relaxing and self-care.You can’t pour from an empty cupSelf-care isn’t SelfishDo more of what makes you happyBubble Baths before Burnout |
| Ok, so this go me thinking. If it’s all bubble baths and pedicures, we’re not going to get anywhere. TRUE. But if it’s all GO GO GO and we feel like nothing short of 100mph with our hair on fire is acceptable, we’ll burn out. (literally! OW!)So, since both are important, we wrote some new quotes…how do you like these?Grind 24/7 but also nap like a kitten on a velvet cloud—balance, babe.Outwork the competition, outshine your past, out-vibe your ex, and still make time for a matcha latte and an Epsom salt foot soak. No excuses.Those didn’t quite nail it for me either. (though they made me giggle, and I believe laughter is one of the best forms of REAL self-care!) So, I thought a little deeper. Where is the line between working hard productively, and damaging yourself to the point that you want to run off and join the circus? |
| Intentional Priorities. |
For me, it came down to understanding WHY I’m working so hard, and what I’m working on and what I’m working towards rather than working hard all the time just so I feel like I’m working. |
| The other day I was grinding away in my office and I looked at the clock and it was 7 pm. My inner Hustle-Maniac grinned, triumphant. “We work late. We are strong.” (she’s a bit of a caveman) Then my inner Babysitter said, “Oh Sweety, no wonder you’re tired, you worked hard. You deserve to knock off. You’ve done plenty.”  |
| I looked down at my to-do list and there were still 4 things on it. Hustle-Mania piped up again. “More to do. Work more. Must cross off all things on list. Said so on Facebook. Productivity is King. Rest is for sissies!” When the chatter between those two gets loud like this, I pause, take a breath, and get intentional (because my brain is tired and I may not be doing my best work!) I look at the items on the list and askIs anyone waiting for me to complete any of these today?Does completing these NOW make a significant difference over finishing them after a good night’s sleep?What do I have going on tomorrow and can these items fit into the day?If I don’t do these tonight, what will happen and how catastrophic will it be?If I do these things tonight, and the results are crappy, how catastrophic will that be?When I ask these questions, sometimes I decide that yeah, working until 8pm is necessary and Hustle-Mania and I get back to work. Sometimes I decide to do one or two more things, and sometimes I bag it all and float into the soft loving arms of the Babysitter and whatever relaxing self-care shenanigans I can drum up for that evening. The key is, I’m not just working to work. I’m being intentional about how I’m balancing the need to work hard, and the need to go slather my face in a mud mask, eat popcorn and watch Golden Girls. (again!) And if I find myself working until 8 or 9 night after night after night, I examine how I’m prioritizing my day, how I’m using (and giving away) my time, and I start trying to figure out how I can bring more of the brain-rest stuff into the mix. And let’s be real. Sometimes there are chapters where busting our butts is the only way. (Talk to my awesome accountant in March/April. Better yet, don’t! That’s one of those chapters!) As long as there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, and that’s not the norm (and it’s not a train), it’s probably ok. But if there’s no end in sight, and you’re starting to get short with the people you love, mainlining caffeine (or more) just to keep going, and seeing your health suffer as a result…it’s time to get creative. Good luck! This ain’t easy, and the balance is going to be different for everyone, but get intentional and hopefully you can find a sustainable pace! (and drink tons of water!) Go get ‘em Tiger. |
