“I don’t know what I’m qualified for. I’m just mediocre.”
This from my friend Derek who is 43 years old, has worked very successfully in multiple jobs in multiple industries (including being hired by me years ago). He has never been fired and probably hasn’t even gotten a “needs improvement” on a performance evaluation. He has over 20 years of solid work experience and a master’s degree.
Dude is NOT mediocre.
(I kinda yelled that at him.)
He was comparing his ‘behind-the-scenes’ to everyone else’s curated internet highlight reel. He was letting his impression of them, and their “hustle culture” porn influence his self-image and his job search…and his happiness and his future.
He wasn’t thinking about how rare and valuable his consistency, experience, communication, emotional intelligence and follow-through actually are. Not to mention all the actual job skills he had built through the years.
A few days later, I saw a “leave one, take one” jar of notes in a coffee shop.
I wrote: “Nobody has it all figured out. You’re doing a great job.” and dropped it in as I plucked one from the jar.
I sent this image to Derek because he needed the reminder that the world didn’t need him to be a flashy success story. The world needed him to be himself.
I asked him to do something simple… make a list of his characteristics, job skills, and all the good things he did in the jobs he has been in for over 20 years. Just focus on himself and the facts.
The list was really long.
So next time you get caught up in the depressing practice of comparing you to someone’s online highlight reel, back up, audit the facts and write down the wins and lessons you forgot when you were checking out someone else’s Instagram. Don’t let some stranger’s experience, marketing or opinions shape what you think of yourself. Let the facts do that.
You’ve survived every worst day of your life…and you’ve got this too.
You’re kind of a badass. Don’t forget that.
